Happy Holidays: The Rap

Happy Holidays: The Rap


Well it's the holiday season

It's the season to be jolly

Time to put up all the lights

Time to deck the halls with holly


Time to wish a Merry Christmas

To one and all

Time to find a freaking parking spot

up at the mall


It's like a Christmas palace, yeah

it's rocking up in my place

More greens than on a salad, man

More stocking than on MySpace


Droppin' yule tide carols

and this yule is phat

and I got more tide

than a laundromat


So many people celebrating

Man, I can't explain

It's like trying to figure

how to flip a candy cane


Bumpin in to cars

Everywhere I go

So many people at the mall

Even Santa like "whoa!"


Santa, look I got some cookie

can I tantalize ya?

With all these kids

I could use some hand sanitizer


You want world peace?

How 'bout an Xbox, boy?

You ain't gotta holla holla

Man, holla at your toy


Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays


It's the Hanukkah season

Make a world of noise

Eating bagels spinning dreidels

with the girls and boys


Gotta light Menorah candles

and never a day late

It's more serious

than the girls on jdate


Doctor, Doctor

"You ate a vodka?"

Too many jelly donut

Potato Latke


You need to get to the hospital

And don't be hasty

You ate too many food

Overdose on tasty


We only got a gallon of gas

How we getting there, mate?

Don't you worry, homey

Something tells me we got eight...


Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays


Kwanzaa, Kwanzaa

All up in the hiz

Hit up Wikipedia

to find out what it is


Seven principles

A tradition that is really

being integral

to Kawida--that's Swahili


I should celebrate all three

Wouldn't that be pleasant?

Why you doing that?

Three times the presents!


Millions of people celebrating

Holidays of every color

Do your homework, laugh it up

Don't be crazy, love each other


Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays